We recently had a very amusing email from a customer who’d bought a Kamry K1000 from us, applauding the product but bemoaning the ‘Chinglish’ instructions that accompanied the pipe.
Very kindly he decided to ‘translate’ those instructions to demonstrate what they could/should describe. Although intended as something of a joke, we couldn’t help but publish them with a wry grin as they may, in all seriousness, be useful!
Here is the relevant extract from his missive:
“Chinglish – You would think that after all these years of manufacturing products for the English speaking world, the Chinese would make more of an effort to produce understandable instructions… they clearly don’t consider it necessary to pay someone who speaks English a few quid to correct theirs. I am going to offer this to them, courtesy of E.A. Carey (if you like), for nothing. Here we go.
Original – 1. Unscrew the top cap of the atomizer and then fill e-liquid into the atomizer.
Re-written – 1. Unscrew the removable cap of the atomizer and then squeeze the desired amount of liquid, from it’s container, into the atomizer. The removable cap is the one at the end of the atomiser into which the mouthpiece is pushed. To remove the cap, first pull out the mouthpiece and then unscrew the cap by turning anti-clockwise. It might be screwed on tightly so some force might be required. If more convenient, the atomiser can be removed completely from the bowl, by holding the bowl and turning the atomiser anti-clockwise.
Original – 2. The battery body is in the condition of working when you are getting it. Pay attention that the positive pole should be upwards and the negative pole should be adown when putting the battery into the battery body. Locking the switch tightly in the clockwise direction after installing the battery correctly. K1000 will be on working after being lightly pressed the top of the switch; and it will be off working when loosen the switch.
Re-written – 2. Batteries are charged before being dispatched so there should be no need to charge before first use although doing so will cause no damage. When charging, insert the battery into the charger ensuring the positive ‘+’ and negative ‘-‘ poles of the battery match the diagram on the charger, then insert the charger into the mains power source. Insert the charged battery into the pipe bowl by first unscrewing the metal top, by holding the bowl and turning the top’s edge-ring anti-clockwise. Ensure the battery is the correct way up which is positive ‘+’ at the top of the bowl and negative ‘-‘ at the bottom. Replace the top by holding the bowl, pushing down on the top’s edge-ring and rotating it clockwise, when the screw threads of top and bowl are in contact. Make sure it is screwed on as far as it will go. To obtain vapour, press down the switch on the top and suck through the mouthpiece. Release the top switch to deactivate the atomiser. For best results, ensure the top is screwed on as tightly as you can, though not so tight that you cannot unscrew it again. When pressing the atomiser activation switch, be gentle although firm enough to activate the atomiser.
Original – 3. Don’t press the switch for a long time in case of battery burnt from overheating when using k1000.
Re-written – 3. Release the atomiser activation switch as soon as enough vapour has been inhaled. Holding it down for long periods can cause overheating and damage the battery and atomiser. When more vapour is required press again and release.
Kamry might have to use a slightly larger piece of paper on which to print the instructions but I am sure it will pay off.”
Mike, we salute you!